Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Fighting for Marriage

This morning I woke up with my mind spinning. It wasn't the normal groggy mess that sort of stumbles through the normal routine of a Wednesday morning. It was alert and it was clear. Marriage was on the mind.

Not just my marriage but Christian marriages in general. There was a sense of urgency that I was not able to shake. As I continued to lay in my nice warm comfortable bed and desperately tried to play opossum, the thoughts of marriage raced through my mind demanding my attention.

As I was laying in bed a thought kept repeating it self...
“Fight. Fight for marriage. Fight for other people's marriage. Hold on for one more day and keep fighting.” This was odd. My marriage is currently doing well. So what gives God?

I know that we have all heard the comparison between a marriage and battle before, for some it may feel as if they have heard it too many times. But just stay with me for a moment. While contemplating the need to stay in the marriage, to not give up, to fight with everything that's in you... Moses came to mind.

(story from Ex 17:8-16)
I remembered the time where Moses told Joshua to choose some men and go out and fight with Amalek, while Moses would go stand on the top of the hill with the rod of God in his hand. Moses held up his had and Israel prevailed, and when he let down his hand, Amalek prevailed. The part of this story that really was sitting home with me this morning was that Moses was not alone. He had taken Aaron and Hur with him. So when his arms became heavy they put a stone under him so that he may sit and then THEY JOINED MOSES. Aaron and Hur supported his hands, one on one side, and the other on the other side, and Moses' hands were steady until the battle was over. Joshua and his men had won the battle.

Now I want to stop here for a minute. I understand reading this story in context it is not literally talking about the issue of marriage. But the full story does talk about the players who fought the battle, the faith to preserver when the odds where against them, that there is a glorious hope that God can be victorious. And in order to be victorious there must be a battle that is fought first.

Moses knew there was going to be a battle. He had faith, he had a glorious hope that this battle could be won. But he DID NOT DO IT ALONE. So many times we think we can will ourselves into a victory. We try hard not to burden other people with our stuff that we just wearily march forward in whatever issue we are fighting. We were not created to be alone, especially during times of tribulations. Moses took two men who were willing to be with him through it all. It wasn't just about Moses anymore, it wasn't just about Joshua and the men fighting on the battle ground, it wasn't just about Aaron and Hur. It was how God used many people to accomplish a victory. Could God have done it on His own? Yes. But He chose to use us and the skills and gifts that He has given us to be apart of his glorious victory. When we take part in God's plan than we are able to have a tangible connection with Him.

I am rambling. Let me get to the point. Marriage is not about two people staying committed to each other. For I did not just make the covenant with my spouse on my wedding day but I made it with God and with other people. Maybe you are the couple who is fighting on the battle field, or maybe your standing on the side lines praying with your hands lifted up, or maybe you have a friend who has a friend whose marriage is falling apart... INTERCEED. GET INVOLVED. We live in a day of age where we don't want to over step our bounds. This is hogwash. When we are in relationship with each other we are journeying this life together. So fight. It might be fighting on our knees, it might be talking with a counselor, it might be being honest with trusted friends who will join with you. But pray without ceasing and allow people the honor to join with you in carrying this burden. The statement of not wanting to burden people is said out of pride. Fight for a marriage. Pray for protection. Let it be a new day.

I end with this thought this morning: Gal 6:1-2
“Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted. Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

So my question is : Am I really fighting for the marriages that are around me

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Anonymous said...

Interesting. What is Godś Divine Will in this matter? How do I know I am doing it? Is it Godś Will that a woman to remain with a man who physically or emotionally abusive? Most would say no. I believe when someone is in trouble I should reach out with what resources I possess. But in reality, I may be of no help or in no position to help.

I loved what St Francis once said: ¨Preach the Gospel. And only when necessary, use words.¨

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